Phones and social media are heavily used these days for people to communicate with anyone and everyone across the globe, which makes them a definite factor in regards to the ways relationships are formed and sometimes destroyed. I’ve always been an advent user of the two and I never had a relationship that required me to think about what it means to grant password access to your significant other until now. There are multiple viewpoints that are attached to this topic. Some believe that it is an invasion of privacy that your partner is owed, while others don’t see any issue with an exchange. I, personally, believe that it depends on your individual relationship and how long you have been together.
If you are potentially in a committed relationships (also known as, “talking”), password access may not need to be exchanged. Most of the times in this stage we are still testing the waters of the relationship to see if our feelings are actually valid towards a person, so adding this extra layer either makes things move too fast or end drastically when we see something we don’t like. It could be something simple as your potential partner messaging another person to form a conversation that turns into a whole argument about “being friendly” or you having a flashback because that’s also how your relationship formed. Plus, most of the time since we’re unsure of our position in this stage we often entertain other people anyway, so it’s only fair to maintain that privacy until you know it’s real.
As boyfriend and girlfriend, feelings and involvement escalate, so access to passwords has a right to be questioned, especially if you have been long-term. I think it’s necessary to have that conversation about how each person feels about the exchange. One may be more private than the other, but it is important to reach a common agreement about the situation. It may be best to simply know the passwords, but that doesn’t equate to going through your partner’s phone everyday just because or at all really. It’s about a sense of comfortability, reassurance, and security that let’s your partner know that you have nothing to hide. If you run into the issue of your partner literally checking your phone everyday or every chance they get, then there is definitely some personal insecurity that your partner needs to work on especially if you never gave him/her a reason to doubt you.
As a married couple, any feelings of doubt and insecurity should have definitely been healed way before the “I Do’s”, but in reality relationships change as we change with age and life experiences so anything can happen. Most married couples should be able to access one another’s social accounts and cellphones, I would assume. At this point, you should be sharing almost any and everything anyway like your home, bank accounts, maybe cars, kids, and etc, so adding this layer shouldn’t be an issue unless it was never addressed before.
Overall, it all depends on your relationship and what you prefer as a person. Having password access makes or breaks a relationship. You can either find out that your partner is an entire solid individual that loves and respects you as they present to be or if he/she was never who they really said they were. In reality, you never really know what you don’t know or what’s going on behind your back, so if there’s nothing to hide it shouldn’t be an issue with your partner asking for access. It’s not invading your privacy if they’re not checking your account more than you do or at all. It’s just letting them know that they have all access if they ever needed it, so there’s no need to worry or feel insecure. After reading this piece, have a discussion with your partner especially if you’re long term/married about where you stand in regards to this. If you have any other views feel free to comment below and subscribe.